I Have Nothing To Say

I have nothing to say
but I am full of nothing
so i hope that by the end
of this, something can come
can give.

I try. I am here. I try. I do.

I still have nothing to say
except I will say this
Since I have nothing to say it is possibly
because I do, have too much to say

But my words are not coming together
The union of words, like
an awaiting bride
keeping herself from leaving... 
her undergarment has the color
red just like the color of love
and the color of death

So If I have nothing to say
it is probably because
the red I see is the red
I refuse to see
I scream: Why are you here in my darkness?
When all I could see is black.

I'd learn to appreciate you
when you leave...
away from me
my body is full of you
but I can't seem to have red
undergarments...
They are grey with envy
and blue with sadness
and black with anger

I have nothing to say
because If I speak these words will turn to dust
and I'll find the treasure of life hard to reach
And you think you know me
I hate you think you know me
When I myself, try to creep
into my own dreams
I myself climb to reach for myself
I go even to the deepest sea
where my fear lurks to find me
and you think you know me?

I have nothing to say.
So I won't pretend to
be giving
I have nothing to give in fact, so I will say nothing
Nothing.

A Question To My Lover (Nothing)

I am now a question to my lover

My lover knows nothing

If it is all

That’s all he knows

Does "nothing" mean he needs to know?

A thought, is thought but buried low

And so it’s hard for him to hear

I want to speak and yet I mute

I mute tonight, so he can’t hear…

what

Nothing’s said

I am now a question to my lover

Nothing is the word to birth a zero

And so nothing (white noise possibly)

Is all that’s uttered 

with lips so tight

A fighter, who am I

If my lover knows nothing

He waits to hear and so time passes

Yet I near to nothing, still

I lock my deed and beg him (hmm)

Practically unannounced, my words

Come tumbling and tumbling they land on zero

And nothing worded

I am now a question to myself

And what am I, what I desire to be had?

I am to say… without a word

Nothing.