Reasons To Live

When there are reasons to live

I know you will bring me the paper

And read it to me

I am six or four or maybe two feet below 

the gravel that you walk on…

You run so fast, so damned fast

But I don’t feel a thing

More reasons 

More and more lies

When there are reasons to live

I know you will again remind me

That these dark windows are

Really the eyes on me

Really the eyes that comfort me

I am six or four or maybe two scared to live

I am not six years old but I feel like a lost bug

Waiting for spanking… don’t fool yourself.

Don’t pretend to be my messenger when

Those days are gone… they choke me

They suffocate me

They take the life out of me

They are criminals

Dark clothed

And dark folding chairs in my consciousness

If you sit on them you will fall

Place the chair right below me

Below

Me

Be

Low

Me.

I Land In You

I am sitting here

Don’t want sit for long

But I do want to become like that naked tree

Wrestling within other sounds of nature

I don’t want to become that dark substance that

Suffocates the speech of silence-ness

(Words begin to make sense mainly

Because there is nothing but silence)

When do I become yours?

When can I walk into your mouth and

Climb down your throat and fall

Fall beyond reach

And get to a slippery part of you?

I die, I die because it’s like music

Music when you say nothing

But just remember me

Because when you drink that coffee

I’ll then get burned

So if you care, take care of me

I can take care of you

I land in you

Cushioned with your love

I land in you because your silence lulls me

And I feel like I have to go through

The better part of me to be with you

But I’m inside and sometimes I feel

Cold and yes sometimes I feel like I am yours

And sometimes I disappear

And that’s because I have become waste

Food that passes through you and I am

As you are here

Going through the changes meant for me

And then I am that tree

That tree that’s sitting…

I am sitting here.